striving to meet the moment,

every aspect of physical existence

is torment..

reaching out to engage with the

pain that racks my body,

stinging fingers and toes,

rapid heartbeat - aching joints,

monstrous migraine - fevered thoughts

vile taste permeates inner core..

night time falls -

the darkness - each night lasts a lifetime:

tossing and turning,

striving to open to the message,

what is this?

day comes - light assumes

temporary relief..

I stride out through plaited countryside,

attempting to break through the barriers

of bodily incarceration..

I glean some measure of hope from

verdant foliage and glistening sunshine,

altho' still distant, in truth,

from touching what is real out there..

I reach vainly for that refuge of hope

within the outer limits of my patience

and understanding..

I pray that this episode will come

to a fortuitous close -

I regret my selfish indulgence,

yet strive relentlessly

to accept my bitter reality..

I vow to trust in the faith

that assures me redemption is at hand

yet struggle with this,

verily, struggle with this truth..

with bows

on waking early this morning,

a new day brings with it

fresh winds and a natural spontaneity..

I bask in the melodrama

of autumnal beginnings..

I relish the ability to

face Life with grace and hope..

I breathe deeply of the novelty

within this unforeseen existence..

the not-knowing,

open to all possibility..

casting aside erudition and expectation,

cutting asunder cynicism and pre-emption..

where does this wind begin?

how beautiful the swaying of the trees,

losing so gracefully their summer's foliage..

I rise, to face a new day with no imagination,

relying solely on presence of Mind...

with bows of joy..

how I truly love this

Holy person..

one who brought humanity

back to mankind with sensitivity, intelligence

and humility..

regardless of the pressures of reported history

one way or t'other,

it is impossible for a reasoned thinker

not to be awed by this Man's impeccability

and integrity..

I refuse to be swayed, by virtue of my received birth - Semitic,

nor by impassioned advocates of doctrine who would

endeavour to force me into an

either/or stance that would led me only into

fear of adopting a untenable position that

casts me into the fires of hell...

I know only that He led an entirely blameless existence;

no stain of evil crossed his actions - ever,

despite immense and sustained provocation...

what an example for us all!

His life was, is and will always be a joy to behold..

He has brought me immense faith

in the finest, absolute potential of human enterprise...

as only a handful of people

 in humanity's shared, short history

I respect him inordinately,

and am immeasurably grateful to know his works

and wondrous explanations,

thoughts, perspectives and championing

 of the underprivileged...

if only we could, as a complete and seamless world,

accept his teachings without division and judgment,

would we find commensurate peace, joy

and fulfillment in our lives.

with bows

sitting amidst a peerless dawn,

opening to the myriad perceptions..

acknowledging the pain and discomfort.,

engaging with every shade and nuance,

the gentle light of daybreak

penetrates...

patiently absorbing the truth of the moment

stillness beckons,

self-absorption dissipates,

the truth of emptiness

prevails..

joy eternal and a pacific smile

engender peace of mind and body:

it simply does not matter

anymore...

I give obeisance with boundless gratitude,

and rise to face the day,

emboldened by the process

of faith,

and knowledge that the instant

is but passing..

 being ‘without' the place

 one ‘wishes' to be ‘in...'

assembled just perceptibly

off vision and thought's

periphery - squatting,

like invading army

sit desire, greed,

impatience and ‘need..'

ahh - this is indeed

the crux of the matter..

can we, in our fateful hour

vanquish little self?

always a part of our unfinished universe,

the need to feel ‘complete'

never able to accept

just THIS..

discomfort, lacking essential satisfaction:

therein lies the ‘rub',

continuously to return to this fearful reality

and face and conquer, with openness

of heart, is my daily

 destiny and struggle..

faith, not blind but oft unseeing, becomes

the warp and woof

of my persistent courage..

I

with bows

having emerged

virtually intact

from a battle

with ‘the darkness..',

herewith

relating self-assuredly,

journeys to nether regions:

to find oneself

lost, disoriented,

without the least energy,

 moral and physical fibre depleted and spent...

 a hard place, gentle reader,

 one which affords

a glimpse of living torment..

with essence shredded,

mind and spirit shattered,

time stands still - and punishes..

each breath betokens

such gargantuan effort,

each thought

frozen and paralysing..

each gesture monumental anguish:

a Nubian tunnel, eclipsing reason,

espousing ragged self-pity,

 rage, despair, oh..  and anger,

yes, anger.

behold!

as circumstance would have it,

blessed relief finally manifests..

faith and determination, snail-like,

inscrutable, return to enrich and nourish,

pouring loving oil over troubled spirit..

gradually, imperceptibly

the love that is the essence and glory

of living and breathing

asserts its ranking authority..

fellow travellers

able to make their presence

and vibrancy felt once again..

thank the Lord for the wisdom and joy

of regeneration and the bounty, inevitability

and glory of refreshment and grace!

‘upon a withered bough

a flower blossoms.'

~ * ~

fluffy, airy puffs of moisture,

tingling -  trickle down

 from vaporized ether..

*

dance of fruition,

the breath of knowing -

a grasp of the unfeigned,

a gasp of the surreal..

*

fragmentary  forgetfulness,

our earth turns: 

 some universal smiling,

an unknowing wink..

*

all is well,

embraceable you,

 embraceable us..

it had to be:  thus.

*

(abundant affirmation:

 spin a thought

for your dissolution...)

*

a grasp of the authentic,

a gasp of the surreal..

*

all is well,

embraceable you,

 embraceable us..

it will be thus.

~ * ~

~ * ~

frettin', slidin', screamin', crying,

achin', bakin' - moo-zik making..

liein', sighing, singin', flying,

kickin', purring, prayin', dieing,

soawl food - settin'  the mood

I lurve the bloos...

~ * ~
*