Today I want to talk about ‘looking in'...
The key to really effective ‘sitting' is in mastering the art of looking in. Before addressing this, we need to establish certain ground rules of understanding...
What exactly do I mean by this? Indeed, who is doing the looking, what is being looked at? Let us take a stance of ‘normality' - or the current apology of social conditioning: you or I have a conventional approach to ‘seeing' who we are - a name, an identity, a body, a mind, a family, friends, interests, a profession/job/or otherwise, a way of being in the world with which we have become accustomed...
So, there you are, ‘X', knowing yourself pretty well; knowing how you react to circumstance, knowing what you like and dislike, knowing who you like and dislike and so on...
Further, there is a definite sense of continuity, is there not? Upon awakening each day, no need to search for clues to your identity - everything seems to fall seamlessly into place - the daily routines kick in wordlessly, thought free...
It may be that there is happiness today. It may be a sense of dissatisfaction, angst, anticipation, excitement, boredom, grief and so on...
Essentially though, a day like any other, unfolding as it does with little surprise, little disquiet, another day along the road...this is normal - this is as it is, with regularity. Then there comes the brainstorm: is that all there really is? Ever had an itch that you cannot reach? (reaching for the nearest doorframe - bound to find temporary relief...)
The suggestion that there is a whole world of refreshment, awakening and ‘deliverance' from this ‘state of inertia' was first posited by Shakyamuni a couple of millennia past...
So, having reached a position of disquiet, to the point of needing, indeed willing a fresh approach to the game, we learn a technique, found by Him, of ‘looking in'...
This simple, wholesome and straightforward action is really easy to do, but paradoxically really hard to master. For when we sit, it is in expectation of ‘something'. And something it is, but nothing we expect. For in the expectation, lie a barrier, a screen and a massive diversion...
When we sit, what are we doing? What are we looking for? What are we looking at? These conundrums are ever present and need to dissolve in their own good time... The art is to simply sit, without expectation and without a goal. This is no easy technique to master, for it goes against the grain of our entire social conditioning as a ‘fast moving', capitalistic ‘player' in the ‘progress' of our ‘civilization'...
What a waste of time!! While sitting there, opportunities lost for self-aggrandisement, making a fast buck, getting one step ahead, etc...
The real goal of effective sitting is in mastering the art of ‘looking in...'
Now, let us sit still...a swirling mass of contradictions appear like an unassailable tsunami...we try to fight our way out of this, to no useful effect.
The secret is neither to avoid, nor grasp...
Of course the natural reaction is to avoid things we do not like, grasp onto things we like - after all, is that not what we have done all our lives? And it has not done us any harm, has it? But really, why are we here, now - why are we uneasy with this status quo?
Like the obedient child, we tell ourselves to listen to the advice - do not tamper with those thoughts - "let ‘em go"...look, listen, open, to what IS really happening here. Behold, a softening, a fuzziness yet a sharpening of insight manifests...
‘Looking in' is letting go of all preconceptions, allowing the wisdom and fecundity of the present moment to manifest without interference from the little self, the controller...
At first and for a considerable period of time, this feels unnatural, difficult and even painful. Do NOT be put off. Trust in the process. To turn back is not an option. ‘Looking in', takes patience, courage fortitude...
I cannot stress too firmly the need to persevere. Only you yourself can make this voyage of discovery. Your identity may dissolve only to bear forth a Joy and Understanding without peer. It may be scary, it may be groundbreaking, it may be awesome - there may be many false starts, but once undertaken, the journey unfolds and the aforementioned conditioning will never hold sway in such a powerful way for you ever, ever again.
These rules are not of this world, but out of this world, the TRUTH will arise naturally...
Journey with countless beings on the royal path to freedom and awakening - learn the gentle, masterful art of ‘looking in'...
With bows,
[and massive bows to Dogen..]
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life
November 2009 
siafu
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